Much like Naiya I am seriously pissed.

It seems our schools have forgotten a few facts about 9/11. When my twelve year old walked up to me and explained that her teacher said the planes that entered the wtc was an “accident” the whole day was a bad accident.

No. Conspiracy theories do not apply here. If you plan to @ me with one please save the time and fuck off. I was at ground zero digging through the rubble. I drove passed the pentagon on my way back to florida where I was stationed. Do not ever tell me it was an accident or it didn’t really happen. I am haunted every year with the memories of what I saw.

I have never shielded my kids from what happened that day. I was stationed on an air force base and my husband was at stationed at Pearl Harbor. We both had completely different experiences but we both agreed not to let our kids not know what happened, we both saw this revised history a few times in different school systems and now I am just pissed. It is akin to saying Pearl Harbor didn’t happen. I say that but I actually had to inform a TEACHER that pearl harbor was not in California. She actually believed this. I walked away from that with a serious headache. I started to question the school then and now I have to question everything when my kids come home from school.

So I leave you with this. 18 years ago today 3000+ people sat with their families for the last time. 18 years ago tomorrow morning the entire US was reeling and we came together as one in mourning. It was a horrible day to be alive but we stood united for awhile. Never forget.


Guys please read… share… whatever you wish to do…

I have been around in this fandom of our for sometime despite the attempts to drive me out of it as a writer and a fan. Some have almost succeeded just because they didn’t like me or my content. Thats fine btw, I really don’t care about that.

What I do care about is the people who consume out content, artists and writers, for free and then belittle us for doing things for money. Recently @rainylune who draws really cute chibis and frogs, I mean seriously cute frogs, was sent an anon basically bitching about the fact that they sell their stuff. WTF people. If they what to sell their items whatever they be who is to stop them? Making the content for all of you is time consuming and if we can make a few dollars as artists doing something we love to do why not?

I know people have sent in issues with those who do commissions. I have been attacked for selling my books. Someone even reported me for it to different places. Well here is the thing, the content I put out is rough. It has the most basic proofing done. In the beginning it wasn’t even done at all and it showed(god i am still embarrassed by some of those things). My books however go through an entire team of proofing experts and they also have to clear a legal team as well. Here is the thing if you attack one artist on some website like tumblr you really are attacking them all. Now the writers who write extended things about game content for games like ikesen and ikevamp you are pretty much in the clear, because of copyright laws as long as you “base” your ideas on the characters. Artists have it more difficult as the concept of the characters from these games is based on their appearance in the game, ikesen for example has characters with traits not normally seen in sengoku japan widely ie Masamune with blue eyes, however I have seen most artist make the characters their own as well.

My point is if we can make a few bucks, and it is a few bucks people, no one is going to get rich by writing these stories or drawing these characters. Most of us are just scrapping by as it is and we still want to do things that make us happy in our free time, however if people like these anons kept coming for us nothing will ever get put out and the fandom dies. Think about that for a minute please before you say stupid shit to content producers just because they have a ko-fi or patreon. We have lives too. We do this for fun remember that too.


Some concerns…

I have received a few messages asking how I am and why I have stopped posting as much as I did even a few weeks ago.

the short answer I am fine and just dealing with a few things. The long answer is I am fine sort of, and I am dealing with many things. As many of you know I am dealing with my husband being in a different state and will be moving there after our kids get out of school in june/july time period. That is a major thing as we both cross the country to spend some time together and work on finalizing our goal, it wears a person down quite a bit regardless. 

The other major factor is my ex has resurfaced with a vengeance. He has been again been in my email, having others do his harassing on the phone, basically his normal assholish behavior. This has lead to sleepless nights, lack of wanting to do much of anything, honestly. It has also brought back the haunting memories of the beginning of this behavior where my life was really in danger. 

Some of you know I did write a story, “Stalked to the Sengoku” to help me cope with real life events with a twist of fiction. However even now nothing is helping. Before you come to me and start saying this or that about cyber laws/stalking laws, know I do know them already. My lawyer, yes I do have one of those, stays current on all my activies and new laws that could help me in the long run. There is nothing I can do at this point except give up. I won’ t do that in anyway shape or fashion. So it seems we are at a stalemate.

I didn’t ask for this, I certainly don’t encourage it, and to be honest I have no understanding why he does the things he does. It’s over. It has been over for nearly two decades. I don’t understand the need to continue this childish and asinine behavior, it shows which one of us was the child even back then and surprisingly it wasn’ t me, who was the youngest by five years. 

Since we live on different coasts for the time being, and he uses anonymizers while he hacks my stuff and changes my passwords, signs me up for health insurance quotes, and whatever else he does he has been deemed a safe threat. yes a safe threat. the same man who beat the crap out of me sending me to the hospital, the same man who tried to run me off the road in the daytime, the same man who terrorized my life for five months while I tried to move on is a “ Safe threat” Which means he may continue his sad and stupid behavior without much consequence. Law enforcement is too overwhelmed with real crimes to worry about this. I know I have tried. He is good at being an asshole, I am good at looking over my shoulder. Life moves on and he gets bored or he finds another victim, I mean girlfriend, and it stops for a while. This is my life. I just wanted people to understand why things will be coming out slowly if at all it is because dealing with nonsense takes a lot out of me, a normally pretty private person, however writing was an outlet I could pout myself into but it can leave me sapped for strength at times, right now I need that strength to deal with him.